Black Girls Brunching: More Substance vs Selfies
In recent years, there’s been a trend of Black women throwing brunches and dinner/breakfast parties in the name of fellowship, sometimes marketing a business/class and even for religious discovery. If you know Black women, you KNOW we love to brunch. Bring out a nice bougie menu with some artisan breakfast foods, bottomless mimosas and a good selfie light with a large hat and a fire Apple Music playlist, that’s a recipe for a great day.
But we do have to be transparent-there are a few things that can definitely be improved upon. Women’s empowerment is starting to become an overused catch phrase- like a good bra you wear because it pushes the girls up and lifts them. The idea of a united front among Black women is celebrated and appreciated, but this new wave of girl power and sisterhood guise can sometimes be more aggravating than empowering lately, especially when it comes to business lunches, brunches and networking events.
There’s a type of decorum and knowledge a woman has to have when launching these types of events to make sure it’s fun, accessible and uplifting for every woman in attendance. Here’s a list of things women would appreciate when attending an empowerment or knowledge brunch to make the most of the experience.
Tell your story...fully.
I’ve been to and seen so many brunches where women pay an exorbitant amount of money (if it’s $250 and up, that’s exorbitant to me), get there expecting to listen to a rags to riches story with the highs, lows, lessons along the way and a few useful products you used to make the coin you make now, only for the speakers to skip the rags and go straight to the riches. It leaves me disappointed and perplexed.
I understand some entrepreneurs had to figure it out on their own, especially women, but if I’m paying you a certain amount of money, I expect more than some finger foods, iced tea and selfies. You don’t have to give me the recipe, but give me part of the sauce. There’s no learning to be done and understanding to be had if all you do is gloss over the important parts of the story and leave us attendees with the crux of “it takes hard work and dedication.” We know that sis, but what else? We paid you because we look up to you and YouTube isn’t enough. Give us the real deal- otherwise, you’re wasting time and money.
If you’re sharing your testimony, get ugly- we came for that! We want the highs and lows and how to pull our own self out of a rut. God is everything but sometimes He isn’t enough- we may need therapy too. Be honest and tell us that.
2. Generic Information
This ties into my first point but is still very valid. Please do not be up at the front of the brunch at the podium in your fly Fashion Nova or online boutique outfit looking like a meal but only giving us snacks-snack sized information, that is.
Women are attending your brunch because they want to learn more about you, your brand and how they can win in the respective industry just like you are. We’re specifically interested in how you started, some of the products/tools you used to make your business run efficiently, a few tips and tricks and the like. If it’s an empowerment brunch, empower us! Have a couple guest speakers, a therapist, a religious leader, etc. Give us books you read, podcasts you listened to, activities to build our self cares skills, allow time for testimonials and other women telling their stories. There is a raw, vulnerable power you have to tap into in order to herald an event meant to uplift a success. I’m tired of swag bags with coupons, useless info and some bulk Office Depot pens with your logo on them-pour into me. If I could’ve Googled this information or you’re regurgitating points from your website, refund me please.
3. Be knowledgeable in what you’re presenting.
Before you place the deposit down on your venue and hop on Instagram live or post on Facebook about your event, make sure you and whoever you bring to guest speak are actually qualified to host. No shade, just transparency. Most folks will trust someone who has at least 3-4 years in their respected industry to get advice from vs someone who’s just celebrating their one year anniversary of their lash business with no significant growth. Bring the receipts. One important rule of thumb is that the event should reach and empower the audience more than the host. Are you actually proficient in business with double clientele and more coin, or are you secretly working a 9-5 because you have to due to you still struggling to see numbers? There’s a very fine line between stepping out on faith and misleading folks-tread lightly.
4). Have pure intentions and be honest in who you really are.
This is one of the most important things myself and attendees are not checking for. If you’re a mean girl in real life but have the audacity to host an empowerment brunch, sit this one out please.
I can’t tell you about how many brunches I’ve heard of women throwing and I look at the flyer to see the host and decide not to go, based off of the reputation of the woman who is throwing it. I don’t mean to judge because I’m not perfect, but if you know that your intentions aren’t pure and you just want to throw a brunch to get a fly Snapchat filter and not care about women’s souls, stuff your money back into your Louis Vuitton wallet and call it a day.
Women can read other women and we talk-your reputation does precede you. There’s no way that I know you to be a generally nasty person or worse, business owner but you’re hosting a brunch meant to unify other women and bring them peace when you’re not at peace with yourself, and you ridicule those who have less than you and are superficial from your lace front to your toes. I’ll see straight through that.
Unless you have a solidified plan to flip this and spearhead an event where you give a testimonial about how life has hardened you and other Black women due to trauma and how they can change, save yourself and us the headache. The Universe will not reward you for wearing a mask and projecting onto other spiritually and emotionally hungry women.
I’m all for a bomb brunch where I leave full of information and inspiration. I value creativity, transparency and vulnerability. I don’t value any of the aforementioned scenarios above. So if you’re thinking about hosting a brunch, please scale bigger in thinking and what your true underlying motivations are for hosting. With purity, grace, fun and a few mimosas and chicken wings, your next brunch could be your best event and talk of the town, gaining you a newfound respect as a neighborhood girl gang representative.